Filling in the Blanks

Kum, Me, Setz, and Sartor
My driver, me and my gunner they don't call our truck Optimus Prime for nothin!
It gone what?


Ok so here it is 3am and I'm sick from a summer sausage binge, and inspired by another blog I just read. I'm gonna try to cover time from right before I went on leave to the time I got back and now............. Cue dream sequence...

Going back to right before I went on leave we were looking for a real dick... A real dirty dickhead. Not only was this guy a dick but he was a smart dick. Our schedule was in tattered ruins from trying to get this guy. We would be up at all hours of the night waiting to go, but no then we turn around and do something else in the morning. Nobody gets a sleep schedule locked down and we were tired fucking dawgs. I was biting my nails and didn't want to fall into the 6 day curse. More than one Soldier that we knew had met his end 6 days prior to RnR. I'm very superstitious out here. I can't help it. I was so tired and finally on the day I was supposed to catch my bird outta here I was at all of wits end. I flew from here to BIAP where I tried my best to stay awake in hopes that the rest of the trip I would spend in deep slumber. I actually ran into 3 guys that I knew from the General's PSD from my last trip to this summer vacation package.
Well the whole time I was gone they tried to get this dick, and like I said he was a slippery fuck. They actually picked up someone close to the guy and Mr. Dick was pissed and made all sorts of threats to us. Well I returned from leave not rested but sick as a dog. I was thinking something like bronchitis or pneumonia or something I still haven't stopped hacking. I wasn't able to do shit for like 2 or 3 weeks. Nothing was really going on, then one morning I was awaken by the sound of alarm to rush my ass to the bunker while some bastards outside the fence launched 9 fucking rockets in. You could here them screaming through the air. SSKRRREEEEEEETCH KABOOM! The alarm would go silent we would funnel out a little then the siren wales again, and just stayed on continuous. We were all so pissed off it sucks to feel helpless like that. Then in the distance we heard the bark of a M2 Bradley Fighting Vehicle letting loose hell from its 30mm cannon. Then the Apaches came in launching rockets. We are all a bit excited but at the same time disappointed cuz this took like 20 fucking minutes of wondering which rocket might land a little to close for comfort. Ahhhh it felt so good to be back to Rocketmiyah.
I can't remember all the missions that we went on because everyday is like groundhogs day here. We did go out on a couple to get ol' dick. To no avail. But to get a dick you have to think like one. One night we went out and, SURPRISE! It wasn't us that grabbed him but it was our plan, and he had no where to run. He eventually tried hiding under a carpet. Seriously his fat ass crawled under a rug and tried to lay flat. No really! It was a good time though. Nothing more than I like watching my men use a 12gauge like a master key and flow into a room with the grace of ballerina's dance recital. Its a beautiful think I tell ya.
Not all of our missions thus far have been barrels of fun. It almost felt like for a while they were picking on poor old 2nd Platoon. We did rise to the occasion though performing duties for certain training teams........ Then getting stabbed in the back by certain training teams..... I won't go any further with that. Your welcome anyway. Then the best ones we get picked for are these barrier missions. Where we go out and play Combat Engimaqueer. Imagine if you will grunts such as us, out there in the midst of darkness, with a group of Iraqi contractors. Now imagine if you will the large Texas (or T) barriers and jersey barriers that are loaded on the Iraqis trucks. Well what we do is get out and place these behemoths, while they are suspended below a crane, driven by an Iraqi, with two Iraqi's on the ground, we are telling them where to put them through the interpreter or through hand signs, then they tell the crane operator, up, or down, or left, or right. These things are absolutely fucking huge and if one fell on you, well that's it. You could easily crush your foot also, or in my case a very large piece of concrete chipped off the top and thank Jesus I was wearing a helmet, that thing rattled my bones. Ahhh but fuck it, its like playing with big ol' blocks in a neighborhood where people want to kill you. Shit how would you feel if you woke up to T barriers in front of your house as you try to maneuver around them just getting out of your drive way, and the normal way you take to work has been blocked off???? It all serves a purpose though......... 2nd Platoon is up to the task. Why were probably the best Infantry barrier putter uppers there are in these parts...... Don't quote me on that. Seriously some of the neighborhoods that are doing this, I guess its what some would call a gated community and some folks like it. I don't know how many or if that's even true but if I knew even half of something I probably wouldn't be here.
But for now we are just kinda sittin idle, waitin for our boys to get back. We did just get some of the new MRAP's. I know that isn't a secret cuz a lot of the Iraqi's out in sector know this due to them not having any power because they don't want to raise their power lines to accommodate the size of the vehicles. Those stupid bastards! They'll learn by golly. You would think they don't realize that we done been here for more den a couple o years, and they need to adjust to what were doin. Hell, it ain't our problem no how them dere Irrrocky's go with no power in da middle of winter. Ya so that truck you've all heard so much about in the press and everything, and in the words of Caroline from Poltergeist "They're heeeeeerrrrree". Thats all I'm going to say about that to avoid crucifixion.
Were hangin in there with CHRISTmas right around the corner. The trees, and the lights are up, the stockings are hung by hundred mile an hour tape with care, in hopes that St. Nick soon will be here. Once again thank you for all of your support.
DEUCE DEUCE OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!